Uhmmm. No.

Today begins a great adventure.  Last week, while at my doctor's office, I told my doctor of my excruciating ankle pain.  It's so bad, especially in the mornings, that I can barely walk.  Some days, I would happily consent to a bilateral amputation (no exaggeration).

So, she ran some tests.  Today, I visit to find out if it's Rheumatoid Arthritis, as the lab tests are indicating.

I'm not going to have that.  Nor, will I have Lupus, also a possibility.  I like "ankle pain" alot better.

Square Peg / Round Hole.

And, so, here we are, at the beginning of August, time for football season to begin.  My son wants to play football, which is a pretty big deal with someone with Autism. 

The simple act of picking up his gear was overwhelming and scary for him, the noises, the coaches, the kids running all about.  The sports physical sent him right into his shell.  He lost his papers.  I became frustrated.  He cried in the car.  I cried in my room.

So, here we go.  6th Grade.  A young adult, who, only a few months ago, learned how to tie his shoes.  BUT...he can solve math equations in his head,  he knows every baseball and football stat you can imagine.  He knows, and charted the weather for four consecutive years.  He wants to play football with his classmates.

Do they view him as a "classmate?"  I don't know, but he is MY SON. 

And, until I take my last breath, I will continue to advocate on his behalf, hold his sobbing body, smile and tell him it will all be ok, mama's right here...

...and, privately, I will sob.

Can he play football in an organized league?  We will try. 

A human BE-ing.

I have made an important decision.  Today, I was inspired (again) by my gardens, while watering them, I realized, they don't really need me.  Flowers have been around for millions of years before me, and will be here again, after I have left this earth.  Why?  They're just flowers.  They seek the Light.  They ask for nothing, they have nothing, but they render joy.

I am however, A Human Being.  A person.  With thoughts, emotions, love, pain, desires, wants, needs, and all types of other egotistical things that go along with it. 

So, I am going to concentate alot LESS on being a Human DO-ing...and MORE on being a human BE-ing.  I'm just going to be.  I shan't force anything.  I shall not yearn for more "things".  I will let my flowers grow, and feed them with Light, love, and spirit.   Feels better already.

"When I find myself in times of trouble, Mother Mary comes to me.  Speaking words of wisdom: Let it be, let it be.

NAMASTE.

The Waterfront Bar and Grill!

Check out today's MENU!  The Waterfront Bar and Grill has OFFICIALLY opened within the Lansing City Market, serving beer, wine, spirits, and an array of AMAZING food, prepared with ingredients from the market.  The patio overlooks the gorgeous river, with a beautiful tiered landscape.  We are SO excited to have this at the Market!  Open till 11am-11pm!  AWESOME!

I Make Things.

I especially like to make new things out of old, unloved, no longer appreciated things.

It's just something I like to do.

HOORAY!

We recently had a FANTASTIC writeup in the local newspaper, The Lansing City Pulse, about our organic farm produce stand, that we own at the Lansing City Market! 

You can read about it here:  http://www.lansingcitypulse.com/lansing/article-4586-bella-harvest-can-be-a-dirty-business.html

It's all perfect.

It may not all be EASY, or make any sense, but just a simple morning stroll through my gardens, camera in hand, reminds me that it's all ok.

"Nobody's Perfect".  I don't buy it.  We may make mistakes, we may have our flaws, we may not look just like everyone else.  But, we ARE perfect.

I've learned not to question it, not to force it, not to fight it, or to figure it all out.  I will simply let it flow, like the seasons, like the river in my back yard.  Like water, air, snow falling, petals dropping from my flowers.  Whether we like it or not, it's all going to happen. 
And, while we may not understand it, there's a deeper reason, one that may not make sense to us now, but, fighting it, denying it, rebelling, will not keep any of it from happening.

All in perfect order.